A Godly Mother

Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies. - Proverbs 31:10

Favor is deceitful, and beauty is vain; but a woman that fears the Lord, she shall be praised. - Proverbs 31:30

I thank God, whom I serve from my forefathers with pure conscience, that without ceasing I have remembrance of you in my prayers night and day; Greatly desiring to see you, being mindful of your tears, that I may be filled with joy; When I call to remembrance the sincere faith that is in you, which was first in your grandmother Lois, and your mother Eunice, and I am persuaded that in you also. Wherefore I put you in remembrance that you stir up the gift of God, which is in you by the putting on of my hands. For God has not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. - 2 Timothy 1:3-7

Intro: Abraham Lincoln is considered by many to be one of the two or three greatest presidents of the United States. He was born in the wilderness in Kentucky and never went to school. His mother taught him to read using the Bible as a textbook. From his humble beginnings he became a lawyer, a politician, and finally president of the United States. His speeches were filled with Scripture references, and it was his leadership during the Civil War that saved the Union. His mother instilled in him the foundation that molded his character. On one occasion, having borrowed a nickel from a friend, when he was paid for some work and had the money he didn't wait until the next time he saw the friend, instead he walked several miles to find him and repay the debt. Lincoln once said, "No one is poor who had a godly mother."

Mother's have an advantage of relationship with their children over fathers, siblings, and friends. She has a nine month head start. There is a bond that is created in the womb. After a few weeks the child begins to hear his mother's voice and it is soothing. It is good for mothers to sing during pregnancy. The child gets to know her, her attitudes and feelings. Newborn babies find comfort in their mother's arms before anyone else's.

When Ethan was born Lhey was very weak after a very difficult pregnancy in which she almost lost him twice. Often when Ethan cried I would carry him around the house and sing to him until he quieted down. But if Lhey was feeling up to it, she would take him and he would stop crying almost immediately. Even now if he's sad or crying, if Lhey is out and I try to comfort him, he will say to me, "I want mom."

Let's consider what we can learn from a godly mother.

I. Transparent tenderness (2 Timothy 1:4).

Most of us learn tenderness from our mothers. I know that men can be tender, but most of us try to exude a macho kind of air. We want to be tough and strong, and we often don't show an example of tenderness. That comes from the mother. It is the mothers who teach their children to be demonstrative, caring, and full of compassion. With apparently an absent father, Timothy was raised by his mother and grandmother. He became a man with a tender heart as illustrated by his tears. That came from his mother.

We were at the Battlefield Mall in Springfield, Missouri one time when Ethan was about four years old. They have a play area for small kids with a little house in the middle and a slide, and then four stations around it. One is a hollow log with a caterpillar crawling over it, another is a car, one is a rowboat, and one a spaceship. They are all made out of hard rubber and the floor is covered with a soft padding like they put on jogging tracks, so it's safe for small children to play and climb around.

On this day we were sitting by the spaceship. A lot of children were there running around playing, and Ethan was playing with a group of boys. But there was one boy there who had no arms. He was playing by himself and had managed to climb into the seat of the spaceship. But when he climbed out of the seat he tripped and fell on his head. He wasn't hurt, of course, but as he rolled over on his knees, Ethan saw him and came and knelt down beside him and said, "Are you okay?" The boy said yes, and Ethan spent the rest of the time playing with that boy until his family left.

You can't imagine how proud I was of my son for having such compassion. But I'm sure he got it from his mother.

II. Authentic Spirituality (2 Timothy 1:5).

Paul thinks of Timothy as a man who is not hypocritical in his Christian life. He is a man of character, which he got from his mother and grandmother. Grandmothers also fill a role in baby-sitting or even raising their grandchildren.

When I was seven my dad left my mother with three small boys to take care of by herself. Since Mom had to work, we often spent time at our grandparent's home. One of my best memories of those days was my Grandma Boonstra sitting in a chair crocheting and singing, "At the cross, at the cross, where I first saw the light." That's where I learned that song, and it's always been one of my favorites.

My Grandma Patterson also played a role in raising one of her grandchildren. My Aunt Marianne had polio in her left arm as a young girl, and then came down with Multiple Sclerosis in her twenties. She had a baby boy named Mike. When her husband left her, she struggled to care for Mike by herself, but as her condition worsened, Mike often spent time at Grandma's house. As old as she was, she put her life into Mike and cared for him. Today Mike is married, has two grown children, and a successful business in Loveland, Colorado. He has done well in his life, but it started with his mother and grandmother.

A church, a Christian school, a circle of Christian friends can teach the facts of Scripture and be influential, but it is a mother who can make the facts real by walking the Christian walk daily in front of her children. It is often the mother who is first to speak to her children about salvation. My mother introduced me to the need of accepting Christ as my Savior when I was seven years old. I finally trusted the Lord when I was twelve, but it was my mother who helped me understand the need.

III. Inner Confidence (2 Timothy 1:7).

With all the derelict fathers in our societies children depend more and more on their mothers. Moms often do all the child rearing, discipline and providing. They have to try to be a father as well as mother. You know how much I love baseball, but it was my mom who always tried to encourage me. She tried to help me build up the confidence I needed to play. Now if you know anything about baseball, you may have heard it said that baseball is 90% from the neck up. That is, you have to have an inner confidence to be able to stand in the batter's box and hit the ball.

Paul tells Timothy that the Holy Spirit instills in us an inner confidence that drives away fear. But that same power that drives away the spirit of fear is often inbred in us by a strong, godly mother.

IV. Unselfish Love (2 Timothy 1:7).

This kind of love seeks the highest good for others. It doesn't quit when it is tired or hurting. Mothers get up at all hours of the night to take care of crying babies and sick children. Even when they are sick themselves, their unselfish loves transcends their own problems to care for their families.

This kind of love doesn't flinch when discipline is necessary. This love will laugh while under pressure. It is unselfish, giving, secure moms that somehow manage to deposit healthy, wholesome kids into our lonely, frightened society.

V. Self-Control (2 Timothy 1:7).

Love needs the balance of discipline to be consistent. A child that is not disciplined will come away believing he is unloved. Last week in Baltimore a certain mother saw her sixteen-year-old son protesting in the streets on TV. She went down to the protest, found him, drug him away, and slapped him on the head saying, "I didn't raise you to be a drug addict, a drug pusher, or a thug." She physically removed him from the rioting and took him home. When a TV reporter interviewed the boy later he said that he was glad his mother loved him so much to take him home. That mom showed her love by disciplining her child.

A psychological study at the University of California showed that 1) boys with high-esteem were clearly more loved and appreciated at home than boys with low-esteem; 2) the high-esteem group came from homes where parents had been significantly more strict in their approach to discipline; 3) the parents of the low-esteem group had created insecurity and dependence by their permissiveness; and 4) the homes of the high-esteem group were also characterized by democracy and openness.

Discipline is necessary for the proper raising of children, but it also needs to be controlled. Often a father will get angry and punish a child unfairly, where the mother in tenderness knows just how much is needed, how to discipline in love, and when to stop.

Con: You may have heard people say, "Everything I am is because of my mother." In my case that is true. My dad left when I was only seven and it was my mom who raised me, disciplined me, took me to activities, and worked full time while doing it. Now Dad wasn't completely absent from our lives, but even he recognized how much Mom did. One night he met our neighbor in a bar somewhere in town and as they were talking the neighbor mentioned to him that he sure had some good boys. Dad said, "It's all due to their mother."

Now you also know that I'm not perfect, but everything I am, every good thing in me, apart from the Lord's doing of course, is because of my mother. Today I hope you will join me in honoring our mothers.